You Were Never Meant to Be the Show Pony
If you’ve spent your life “performing” in the ring, the kitchen, the church pew, or the marriage you tried so hard to make work—you are not alone. As a lifelong horsewoman, homeschool mom, coach, and ranch wife, I’ve built a life on grit, hard work, and high standards.
But somewhere along the way, I started to disappear into the very roles I had worked so hard to fulfill.
What started as excellence became a burden of perfection. What began as obedience turned into fear of disappointing people. And what felt like purpose? It started to feel like pressure.
That’s why I created the Holy Grit, Whole Heart podcast series: to untangle the lies we’ve believed about worth, work, and what it means to be good.
The 4-Part Series That Pulls Back the Curtain
This is more than a podcast. It’s a reckoning.
1. Off Pattern: When Performing Is No Longer the Goal
A story of waking up to the realization that I’ve spent my scorecard life earning gold stars that never quite added up to peace. This episode explores what happens when your value isn’t tied to the scoreboard—or the applause.
2. Invisible Until Needed: The Burden of Being Capable
What happens when you’re the strong one everyone depends on—but no one checks on? This is for the high-functioning, high-capacity woman who’s tired of holding it all together alone.
3. The Myth of the Good Girl: When Obedience Becomes a Disguise
A deep dive into faith, people-pleasing, and the false gospel of being agreeable. We talk about the difference between obedience to God and performance for people—and why “being good” isn’t always godly.
4. When Rest Feels Like Failure: Unlearning the Hustle Gospel
Raised in barns, kitchens, and arenas where rest was a reward, not a right—we unpack the discomfort of stillness and reclaim rest as a holy rhythm, not a luxury.
The Bigger Problem: Why Western Women Struggle with Self-Worth
- We’re taught to show up strong—no matter what.
- We’re praised for never complaining.
- We’re expected to serve endlessly, love sacrificially, and look good doing it.
- And then we’re told to “practice self-care” as if that’s not another job to check off.
Sound familiar? If you’ve ever felt like your value is in your usefulness, this is your cue to stop. Breathe. And ask yourself:
What if I didn’t have to prove anything today?
How to Start Letting Go of the Scorecard Life
Here are a few small, gritty ways to begin:
- Delegate one thing you always carry. Let someone else feed the horses. Skip the perfect dinner.
- Say an honest no. Not because you’re rude—but because you’re ready to be real.
- Protect one pause each week. Schedule it like a branding appointment.
- Download the freebie: What Do I Stand For? – This soulful, gritty worksheet will help you reconnect with what matters most.
Favorite Takeaway Quotes:
“You don’t have to disappear to be dependable.”
“Obedience flows from identity—not insecurity.”
“Rest isn’t weakness. It’s worship.”
“God isn’t holding a scorecard—He’s offering you a seat at the table.”
Want More?
- Listen to the full Holy Grit, Whole Heart podcast series here
- Join my email community for more heart-level truths, seasonal letters, and legacy coaching: Legacy Letter Signup
- Get coaching and legacy tools for women living Western, faith-rooted, impact-driven lives: Branded to Lead
Keep riding, sister. You don’t need to earn what’s already been given.
And if you’re ready to live with holy grit and a whole heart—I’ll meet you there.